Thursday, September 6, 2007

Feelings of Former- JW

Quick note, I'm a disfellowshipped former Jehovah's Witness for over 8 years now and still married to a Witness.

Sounds like trouble in our marriage, yes, but not more so than any other couple.

Goal of this Blog: To share feelings and thoughts with others who've been disfellowshipped or "wronged" by the religion. And for all those thinking this last message is not possible, it is, and a truly open minded, non-judgemental, truth-seeking individual will know this.

About me- I consider myself a lover of truth, righteousness and good people. I've always cheered for the good-guy in movies, cried at the injustices of this world, no matter who was wronged or who committed the wrong, watch "White Light/ Black Rain" a documentary about the atomic bomb dropping on Japan. If this doesnt move you to tears and even question what America did, you might not be open minded.
I still believe in many if not most of the teachings i've learned through my years as a Witness.
Why then don't I attend? I personally don't feel I could preach to others knowing what happens in congregations all over the world. (I'm truly not trying to sound self-righteous here)

Simply put, everyone including elders, circuit-overseers, Bethelites, and on and on are imperfect, ALL religions will probably agree with this statement.

By this simple fact, and with all the "unfaithfullness" and other wrongdoing committed by ALL witness, and with imperfect elders presiding over "congregational matters" you have to believe there's some who've "been wronged" by those in charge. No other way to put it. I know because it happened to me, and I would bet that it' s happened to others.

No one know's how they would react if they truly were put in a position where they sought truth and justice, and didn't find it by the very organization and individuals put in charge of safeguarding the "flock" or "followers"

Would you cry for those who are wronged? Feel distressed for those who were not dealt with justly?

I choose to do so, and will always do so no matter who commits the wrong. I'll re-emphasize this, no matter who commits the wrong or just made a mistake, even the organization or elders.

How can "followers" not see this, or turn away from it when it happens? The standard answer is, because: "The light is getting brighter" "Jehovah will deal with it" or " We don't know the whole story"

Anyone who's dealt with difficult problem will know their circumstance without a doubt.
But the way the organization is set up, it puts anyone who's been wronged on the defensive position.

I really don't think Elders know who to deal with the feelings of a (ex.) faithful spouse. There's so much going on through their minds that they'll do things they otherwise wouldn't.

Really think on this point, if you question elder's decisions in any way, you're not "putting your trust in Jehovah" which makes you look bad and can even have recourse.

Lets say for the sake of arguement, you do "put your trust in Jehovah" and, for the sake of arguement lets use unfaithfulness, the fornicator is not disfelloshipped. The faithful spouse still hears the phone ringing in the middle of the night with hang-ups, the two who committed the adultery work together... you as the faithful spouse clearly see that something's still taking place. You as the faithful partner have to trust the elders and if nothing happens to the unfaithful partner, you really simply have to live with it.

That will truly test your faith. This is clearly one example, my example. I have to believe there's other, more severe problems "followers" aren't aware of. I can only imagine if my children were molested by someone in charge of the congregation. That's definitely a "more severe" problem.

If you've had such feelings or were even the person who did wrong and are disfellowshipped and have similar feelings you can share them here. I will.

There's many more things to discuss and hopefully get insight from others.

And for those who will comment negatively on this site, don't look for an argument here, you won't find one. I don't want to stray anyone from what they want to be.

By: Author in West Texas

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